When I started this Project 24 days ago, I never expected to be faced with a family death. Life is always filled with unexpected moments. So of these are joyful and others are sad. I had come to realize years ago, we can not experience one without the other.
I will be honest, it was a challenge to stick to an exercise routine while I had low energy from the sadness and mourning I was experiencing, as I was faced with the loss of my uncle. Most nights, when I got home from work, I just wanted to do nothing. I know myself well enough to know, I find it difficult to put on a brave face for the people around me when I am sad inside. I love people and am great at my job, I work in human resources. I am pretty friendly, and outgoing; most people might even think of me as an extravert. However, through the years I have come to understand how introverted I really am. I love being around other people. It brings me joy, but when it comes to charging up my battery so to speak. The way I do this is locked away in a room by myself for hours. I just need to be alone to get more energy. I find it even more draining when I am feeling sad. I sometimes have to pretend to be happy go lucky because my job deals with helping people. I don’t want to take my troubles to work, nor my work home. I believe a healthy balance between the two is important.
As I was feeling down, and my energy was lower than usual when I got home from work. I found continuing exercise habits which I have been trying to build, more challenging to stick to. In the past I might have had something which caused a similar physical reaction to my energy level; I would have just given up feeling defeated. Instead, this time I feel motivated to continue moving forward. I am not going to get mad at myself for the reaction to the situation. Or even get mad I felt low in energy all last week. No, I will pick up and get back on track.
Today as I woke up, I had a thought with such clarity about all this. I have often lived in a mentality there was not enough. I had been talking to my mother the other day when she was complaining about her finances. I was encouraging her to have more faith and trust God would provide. As I drove to work singing praise to the Lord during my commute, I remembered the conversation I had yesterday. Then God revealed to me that the mentality I had often about money, and there not being enough; I also had about my energy. Now when I am faced with obstacles in my life which drain the amount of energy I have, instead of getting defeated and believing there is not enough. I will look towards the Lord and pray for more energy to exercise. Even if it is for fifteen minutes. I am going to practice this idea with something as simple as exercise. However, I can see how asking God to provide even when I believe there is not enough, will translate into so many other areas of my life. I look forward to sharing the results.
2 Corinthians 9:10
For God is the one who provides seed for the farmer and then bread to eat. In the same way, he will provide and increase your resources and then produce a great harvest of generosity in you.